My child’s EOTAS (education otherwise than at school) provision took over seven years to acquire. Seven years filled with frustration, trauma and distress; battling with a system that should have supported my child, but instead blamed him (and me) for being autistic. Now that we have a semblance of peace and an opportunity to thrive, … Continue reading Our route to ‘EOTAS’ (Education Other Than At School)
Parental blame, domestic abuse and autism…
Introducing: The Experiences of Domestic Abuse Survivors -Parental Blame and the PDA Profile of Autism For those parent-carers who have been in abusive, intimate relationships, navigating systems of SEND can bring about particular challenges. Encountering blame as a parent-carer whilst advocating the needs of autistic children can be uniquely impactful for those parent-carers who have … Continue reading Parental blame, domestic abuse and autism…
Autistic Hospital Experience: needlessly chaotic care.
There is a large banner in the hospital's most prominent entrance, boasting how accessible and inclusive the NHS Trust is for disabled people. Ironically, I only noticed this on my eventual discharge - after five very long and tortuous nights. I entered the hospital via Accident and Emergency, in a flurry of paramedics and gas … Continue reading Autistic Hospital Experience: needlessly chaotic care.
Autistic Needs VS Carer’s Needs – are they in opposition?
Which set of needs are easier to have met? My needs as a carer, or my needs as an autistic adult? Is this a trick question? The interactions I have with "services" and organisations directly affect my well-being and daily functioning. Summoning up the energy to verbally communicate with strangers requires extensive effort for me. … Continue reading Autistic Needs VS Carer’s Needs – are they in opposition?
Autism has nothing to do with intelligence.
I didn’t realise at the time, but I was given a huge clue as to my own neurodivergence as a young adult embarking upon my first professional job interview. “Did you write this yourself?”, was the closing question put to me following a rigorous civil service interview, throughout which I had stammered, stumbled over my … Continue reading Autism has nothing to do with intelligence.
Parental Blame and the PDA Profile of Autism – NEW RESEARCH
“Parent blaming is destabilising … it makes you a worse parent … the harm it does is long-term … it has ruined my relationship with my child.” We know that parent-carers are often blamed for their disabled children’s presentations, particularly when children have hidden disabilities such as autism. Research has already been undertaken on this … Continue reading Parental Blame and the PDA Profile of Autism – NEW RESEARCH
Spoon theory and autism. Is it helpful?
Without divulging the intricate details of how my autistic family "meltdown", I do want to talk about when things begin to fall apart and the most recent professional advice I have received regarding dealing with "dysregulation" / "meltdowns" / "heightened behaviour" / "episodes of distress". There are so many words for autistic overload and I … Continue reading Spoon theory and autism. Is it helpful?
Slurs against autism – 3 phrases I hate to hear, as an autistic person.
Mainstream media is awash with lazy descriptions of autism. The same phrases are repetitively harnessed and published (seemingly) without consideration given to the fact that they might not be accurate. Or be extremely offensive towards a group of people already marginalised by society. A simple news search delivers some pertinent examples, just from this week: … Continue reading Slurs against autism – 3 phrases I hate to hear, as an autistic person.
The dangerous hypocrisy of disability provision. Being an autistic mother.
Imagine this; a person with a legally recognised disability, amounting to a protected characteristic under equalities law, being systematically denied their rights. And the methodology used to withold these legally enshrined rights (to assessement and provision), is a concerted campaign of blame, false allegations and psychological abuse. This could be the premise of a best-selling … Continue reading The dangerous hypocrisy of disability provision. Being an autistic mother.
As a mum to autistic children, I regret sharing my autism diagnosis. I have received blame, not support.
Revealing an autism diagnosis to others is a daunting prospect. No matter how much pride you have in yourself and your neurotype, the process of sharing personal information can place you in a vulnerable position. The response of others is never predictable, and whether you are emotionally invested in their response or not, it is … Continue reading As a mum to autistic children, I regret sharing my autism diagnosis. I have received blame, not support.
The-Aut-Vocate 